Monday, July 11, 2005

Simha, Narasimha


Captain smoking kolli kattai

Narasimha is probably the best Indian film made. With Captain in the lead, this is a "Ramanarayan" genre movie which entertains you like no other film. I regret to have not watched it on the big screen. But on second thoughts, bigger screen means bigger Captain. Thus it is better for kids, heart patients and pregnant ladies to stay away.

Continue laughing...

The film starts off by letting the enemies know the ferocity of Captain. The bad guys run as soon as the higher authority radios to them saying, "Hey adhu Narasimha, avan kitta vechukkatha, odidu". Honestly, the result would have been the same if the bad guys had come to see Captain upclose. So such radioing technology only added unnecessarily to the production cost.

Captain sports a long overcoat in colours capable of blinding the enemies and the audience in a jiffy. Approximately 1 billion cocoons were destroyed to stitch one coat to coverup Captain and the material, which closely resembled Vadivelu's Dubai dress is believed to be silk. Of the two years production time for this movie, one and half years is believed to have been spent stitching Captain's majestic attire. Captain always wears mathcing coats...so at any given point in the movie he was dressed from head to toe in colours like metallic blue, orange, flourescent green and not to mention the ONYX (enga ooru kuppaikaaran!) style shiny military costume.

Isha Kopikar comes all the way from Singapore to seal her fate here. A Kili Josiyar tells her that she is going to collide with an aan azhagan, sooraathi soran, pant poatta singam tonight. Next scene, she collides with Captain and does a good job to stay on her feet. A truly laudable effort. She immediately falls in love with Captain, for which she was paid an extra 10 lakh salary. The director needs to be appreciated for the hidden message conveyed : don't believe in astrology.

Captain then gets into his role. He challenges criminals and always manages to outsmart them with his brilliance. He kills three people in Mumbai, Calcutta and Cochin and kidnaps three others. People are supposed to be guessing as to who Captain is, but I knew for sure he would work in some form or the other, atleast a jeep driver in the Indian Army.

The first killing is immediately followed by some romance. People today talk high about Vikram for portraying Anniyan and Ambi alternatively. Captain just did that years ago. He jumps from the top of a 40 storey building to save Isha from a bomb, collecting her on the way from the 35th storey and landing on a bed of roses with Captain on top. She would have preferred the bomb, yeah. Captain hugs her and she smiles. A brilliant perfomance by her to manage a smile at this point. She was paid another 10 lakhs for this. A fast paced duet song with Captain dressed in red shirt and yellow pant was first of its kind. Captain does manage to shake his legs for this song. Since the beats were pretty fast, the technical team did a good job to fastforward Captain's steps to achieve the sync.

The second killing is again followed by romance underwater. I am sure Vikram took a leaf from Captain's book. This was in Calcutta yeah, but Isha was forced to follow Captain wherever he went. Another 10 lakhs. The policeman tries to kill Captain by setting a bomb in his front wheel (indha ondraiyana scene-ku Speed technology vaera!). Captain finds out by psychic powers that there is a bomb and shoots the wheel off. Captain then does circus acts by driving the car with three wheels. But not withstanding the his weight, the wheel touches the ground finally and avamanam thaangama Captain jumps into the river where he does touching touching with Isha Kopikar. Naakku madichu romantic look ellam vittaru.

The third murder was supposedly a depiction of Narasimha avatar. Captain fights with his bare body adorned with Kalyani covering jewels. Looked more like Varaha avatar. Occasionally he would growl like a lion which unfortunately the camera caught on close up. Three casualties have been reported so far in Kancheepuram district.

This is when, the Indian army officers Anand Raj and Nasser, dressed in yellow shirt, black pant and a yellow tie with black spots, report to Raghuvaran about the acts of Narasimha. They are mocked at. So they decide to kill Narasimha. They shoot around 12 bullets. Captain dodges all of them a la Neo. He was actually asked to bend back like Neo, but since that is an impossibility, he manages to move sidewards. Raghuvaran reveals the identity of Captain . . .

"Avana thulaikka innum bullet-ey kandu pudikkala" (mudhal-la adha seyyanum!)
"Ashoka chakrathula moonu singam dhaan paarthirupeenga, ivan dhaan naalaavathu singam" (asingam-a?)
"He is India's one man army" (aamama, oru man-ey army maadhiri dhaan irukaaru)

Next, strategies to curb terrorism are discussed with Captain's expertise. The camera zooms into Captain's face till the screen is replete with it. The terrorists come to know about all these through a mic fitted in a pigeon named "Vallarasu". Captain follows the bird to find out the terrorist!!

Captain's family arranges for his marriage with Isha. Isha comes with a parrot in her hand during the ponnu paarkara function. Directorial touch : kili-a valarthu edhu kittayo kodukkara maadhiri. Captain agrees to marry her and Isha gives is all overjoyed (+10 lakhs) and gives a horrendous smile. Reality : Perfect match dhaan! Another duet. Indha song shoot pannarchae Captain-ku kaal idukkula katti me thinks. Steps ellam Captain standards-ku illa. On the day of the marriage, Isha understandably goes into coma. Narasimha cries for the first time.

Captain is then given the task of sweeping out the terrorists in 4 days. He analyses the issue with a team of 10. The team members tell him that the terrorist is in some glacial region looking at a video which the terrorist had sent in. But Captain was clever enough to find some vegetation in that pic!! He says the pic is morphed!! He "de-morphs" it somehow and people are surprised to see glaciers replaces by desert! So was I!!

The team then goes to the terrorist hideout. Captain gives his command, "Mizan Started". He is dressed in something which was used by potsman in the British era. He then tries to instill some humane qualities into a terrorist with a half hour speech. The terrorist dies.

Captain then manages to fire some 200 rounds using a small pistol and at the same time manages to dodge the machine guns which eventually runs out of bullets. The last scene-la Captain fights with the terrorist and kills him. It was bloody. I would have appreciated a more non-violinistic approach of a half hour speech.

I was a little disappointed with the director for not utilising Captain's blood red eyes effectively. Captain wears brown contacts in the film. Boo hoo :-(

Captain's punch was aweosome. The way he says Simha...Narasimha is believed to have made Narasimha Rao laugh.

An appreciable feature in this movie is that everybody knows Tamil including the Pakistani terrorist Akthar Bawa to enable them to communicate freely with Captain. English is the last language I'd like Captain to speak. Damil Daai needs him!!

Captain thus suceeds in making India a safer place to live in andeverybody is happy that movie is over :-)

Epilogue : After this movie, Isha Kopikar became the richest woman in the world :-)

P.S. : I was planning to release Saniyan Part 3, but Captain always gets priority :-) Next post-la Saniyan will definitely continue.

P.P.S : Yayy!! Google ads are up! :-)

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