The Chennai Nexus
This post is driven by two main reasons. One, today is Chennai's (Madras) 366th birthday. Two, to stop the excessive damage being carried out on yours truly in the last post 
What follows is a personality test sorta thingy that reveals your Chennai connection. Those of you who are extremely jobless, take a pencil and paper and mark your choices. Those of you who are extremely busy, stop acting and take out that pencil and paper now!
So lets start off . . .
1) What is the population of Chennai?
A. 42.16L
B. Naapathi rendu pulli onnu aaru latcham.
C. Enakku 2yrs irukkumboathu 20 lakhs. Naan innum matter pannala. So innum 20 lakhs dhaan.
D. I will decide that after marriage.
2) One word that rhymes with Chennai . . .
A. Vennai
B. Brunei
C. Yaanai
D. Pakkathu veettu nei.
3) First thing that comes to your mind about Chennai . . .
A. Cooum nadhi and kosu kadi.
B. Sambhar Vadai (Witchu is kindly requested to skip this option)
C. Maari Annan beach.
D. Boozing and niravana.
4) Does Chennai have an IT corrdior?
A. No, only moothara sandhu.
B. Yes, at Panagal Park.
C. Yes, starting with Tidel Park.
D. Don't care, I want more pubs to quarter adichu kuppara padukka.
5) Where do you go for pozhuthu poakku?
A. Barrista going and guitar sorinjing.
B. Beach going and sundal eating.
C. Parangi mountain Jothi going and bit film seeing.
D. Ribbon building going and ribbon pakoda eating.
6) About the Chennai climate . . .
A. Veyyil adichings and verthu kottings.
B. Too hot to do the yo-yo.
C. Hot in winter, hotter in summer and hottest in Ranganathan Street due to nuclear fission respiration.
D. Pleasant climate, mild showers, cloudy skies.
7) Where would you like to go shopping?
A. Globus, Lifestyle and other nuni naakku English shoppes.
B. Maavu mill.
C. Getting crushed in Pondy Bazar, to come out and find your undergarment missing.
D. Pakkathu veettu kodi while thuni is dried.
8) What mode of transport do you prefer in Chennai?
A. Deepavali Rocket.
B. Pallavan Bus-la ponnungala idichuttu goings.
C. Silencer illatha bike.
D. Ponnungala sight adichuttae medhuva walking.
9) Where is the beach in Chennai?
A. Gandhi thatha-ku apaala.
B. Near the sand.
C. Next to Barrista.
D. Wherever lovers are disturbed by sundal boys and josiyakaaris.
10) What is would you like to eat in Chennai? (To be skipped by Witchu)
A. Cottage cheese with Pasta Bake.
B. Idly with 2 bucket sambhar and filter coffee.
C. Packet saarayam, water packet and oorgai.
D. Gopi fry (of Metti Oli fame)
Proceed to Analysis...
Score Key . . .
1) A - 3pts .... B - 2pts .... C - 1pts .... D - 4pts
2) A - 2pts .... B - 3pts .... C - 4pts .... D - 1pts
3) A - 2pts .... B - 4pts .... C - 1pts .... D - 3pts
4) A - 2pts .... B - 1pts .... C - 4pts .... D - 3pts
5) A - 3pts .... B - 4pts .... C - 2pts .... D - 1pts
6) A - 2pts .... B - 3pts .... C - 4pts .... D - 1pts
7) A - 3pts .... B - 1pts .... C - 4pts .... D - 2pts
8) A - 1pts .... B - 2pts .... C - 3pts .... D - 4pts
9) A - 2pts .... B - 1pts .... C - 3pts .... D - 4pts
10) A - 3pts .... B - 4pts .... C - 2pts .... D - 1pts
Add up the points and move on to the analysis....
>40 : Aarva kolaar-la thappa add panniteenga. Please try again!
35-40 : Neenga bayangara Chennai lover. Bangalore pona, "Ithu waste, inga beach illa"-nu solluveenga. Bombay pona, "Ithu waste, inga Marina beach illa"-nu solluveenga. Sila samayam Peter vitta viduveenga aana figure-a correct pannarthukaaga English pesara category neenga kedayaathu. Neenga nallavaru, vallavaru, matter therinjavaru. Pucca Chennaiite. Morning walking poitu, appadiye kovil poi saami kumbittu, vara vazhi-la Saravana Bhavan-la extra nei-oda Pongal poatta pakkathula irukkaravana madhikka maateenga.
25-34 : Neenga bayangara Peter. Unga kitta irukkara dresses ellam mutti-ku two inch keezha varaikkum dhaan maximum pogum. T-shirt a thoikkara pazhakkam kedayaathu. Jeans kizhinju saayam pona use pannara recycler neenga. Figure kootittu poi yo-yo pannaraen pervazhi-nu neraya seruppadi vaangi irupeenga. Mudi-ku color adichu irupeenga mandai maela coffee kottina maadhiri. Dance aadina crowpain (kakavalippu) vandha maadhiri aaduveenga. Amma veetla coffee kalantha vaenaam sollitu Coffee shop poi 50Rs. coffee-a straw poattu nakkuveenga.
15-24 : Neenga very galeej parties. Daily evening unga friends Kabali, Mayandi and Muniyandi kootittu TASMAC sarakku adipeenga. Chennai veyyil-layum kulikkara pazhakkam kedayaathu. Unga ponjaathi veettu velai seyyum. Keenju pona cut banian and kattam poatta lungi dhaan unga favourite costume. Enga saavu vandhaalum, anga neenga dhaan Prabhu Deva. Gujili kooda Gilma pannarthu unga favourite passtime.
10-14 : Bihar mein Laloo nahi, thamizhnaadu mein neenga nahi. (Bihar-la Laloo illaya, adhu maadhiri Tamilnadu-la neenga) Chennai pathi oru M-um theriyaathu ungalukku. Appuram enna M-ku indha quiz edutheenga? Marina beach pakkam poi nillunga, Tsunami anuppi veikkaraen.
<10 : Ungalukku adippadai arivey illa. 10 questions-ku score eppadi less than 10 pogum with minimum one mark per question? Neenga mostly Railway Minister-a irupeenga.
If you are not happy with the results, keep trying till you are satisfied. Take the average, standard deviation, correlation and all other confusing useless statistical data to get an accurate result. If its still not accurate, blame statistics.
What follows is a personality test sorta thingy that reveals your Chennai connection. Those of you who are extremely jobless, take a pencil and paper and mark your choices. Those of you who are extremely busy, stop acting and take out that pencil and paper now!
So lets start off . . .
1) What is the population of Chennai?
A. 42.16L
B. Naapathi rendu pulli onnu aaru latcham.
C. Enakku 2yrs irukkumboathu 20 lakhs. Naan innum matter pannala. So innum 20 lakhs dhaan.
D. I will decide that after marriage.
2) One word that rhymes with Chennai . . .
A. Vennai
B. Brunei
C. Yaanai
D. Pakkathu veettu nei.
3) First thing that comes to your mind about Chennai . . .
A. Cooum nadhi and kosu kadi.
B. Sambhar Vadai (Witchu is kindly requested to skip this option)
C. Maari Annan beach.
D. Boozing and niravana.
4) Does Chennai have an IT corrdior?
A. No, only moothara sandhu.
B. Yes, at Panagal Park.
C. Yes, starting with Tidel Park.
D. Don't care, I want more pubs to quarter adichu kuppara padukka.
5) Where do you go for pozhuthu poakku?
A. Barrista going and guitar sorinjing.
B. Beach going and sundal eating.
C. Parangi mountain Jothi going and bit film seeing.
D. Ribbon building going and ribbon pakoda eating.
6) About the Chennai climate . . .
A. Veyyil adichings and verthu kottings.
B. Too hot to do the yo-yo.
C. Hot in winter, hotter in summer and hottest in Ranganathan Street due to nuclear fission respiration.
D. Pleasant climate, mild showers, cloudy skies.
7) Where would you like to go shopping?
A. Globus, Lifestyle and other nuni naakku English shoppes.
B. Maavu mill.
C. Getting crushed in Pondy Bazar, to come out and find your undergarment missing.
D. Pakkathu veettu kodi while thuni is dried.
8) What mode of transport do you prefer in Chennai?
A. Deepavali Rocket.
B. Pallavan Bus-la ponnungala idichuttu goings.
C. Silencer illatha bike.
D. Ponnungala sight adichuttae medhuva walking.
9) Where is the beach in Chennai?
A. Gandhi thatha-ku apaala.
B. Near the sand.
C. Next to Barrista.
D. Wherever lovers are disturbed by sundal boys and josiyakaaris.
10) What is would you like to eat in Chennai? (To be skipped by Witchu)
A. Cottage cheese with Pasta Bake.
B. Idly with 2 bucket sambhar and filter coffee.
C. Packet saarayam, water packet and oorgai.
D. Gopi fry (of Metti Oli fame)
Proceed to Analysis...
Score Key . . .
1) A - 3pts .... B - 2pts .... C - 1pts .... D - 4pts
2) A - 2pts .... B - 3pts .... C - 4pts .... D - 1pts
3) A - 2pts .... B - 4pts .... C - 1pts .... D - 3pts
4) A - 2pts .... B - 1pts .... C - 4pts .... D - 3pts
5) A - 3pts .... B - 4pts .... C - 2pts .... D - 1pts
6) A - 2pts .... B - 3pts .... C - 4pts .... D - 1pts
7) A - 3pts .... B - 1pts .... C - 4pts .... D - 2pts
8) A - 1pts .... B - 2pts .... C - 3pts .... D - 4pts
9) A - 2pts .... B - 1pts .... C - 3pts .... D - 4pts
10) A - 3pts .... B - 4pts .... C - 2pts .... D - 1pts
Add up the points and move on to the analysis....
>40 : Aarva kolaar-la thappa add panniteenga. Please try again!
35-40 : Neenga bayangara Chennai lover. Bangalore pona, "Ithu waste, inga beach illa"-nu solluveenga. Bombay pona, "Ithu waste, inga Marina beach illa"-nu solluveenga. Sila samayam Peter vitta viduveenga aana figure-a correct pannarthukaaga English pesara category neenga kedayaathu. Neenga nallavaru, vallavaru, matter therinjavaru. Pucca Chennaiite. Morning walking poitu, appadiye kovil poi saami kumbittu, vara vazhi-la Saravana Bhavan-la extra nei-oda Pongal poatta pakkathula irukkaravana madhikka maateenga.
25-34 : Neenga bayangara Peter. Unga kitta irukkara dresses ellam mutti-ku two inch keezha varaikkum dhaan maximum pogum. T-shirt a thoikkara pazhakkam kedayaathu. Jeans kizhinju saayam pona use pannara recycler neenga. Figure kootittu poi yo-yo pannaraen pervazhi-nu neraya seruppadi vaangi irupeenga. Mudi-ku color adichu irupeenga mandai maela coffee kottina maadhiri. Dance aadina crowpain (kakavalippu) vandha maadhiri aaduveenga. Amma veetla coffee kalantha vaenaam sollitu Coffee shop poi 50Rs. coffee-a straw poattu nakkuveenga.
15-24 : Neenga very galeej parties. Daily evening unga friends Kabali, Mayandi and Muniyandi kootittu TASMAC sarakku adipeenga. Chennai veyyil-layum kulikkara pazhakkam kedayaathu. Unga ponjaathi veettu velai seyyum. Keenju pona cut banian and kattam poatta lungi dhaan unga favourite costume. Enga saavu vandhaalum, anga neenga dhaan Prabhu Deva. Gujili kooda Gilma pannarthu unga favourite passtime.
10-14 : Bihar mein Laloo nahi, thamizhnaadu mein neenga nahi. (Bihar-la Laloo illaya, adhu maadhiri Tamilnadu-la neenga) Chennai pathi oru M-um theriyaathu ungalukku. Appuram enna M-ku indha quiz edutheenga? Marina beach pakkam poi nillunga, Tsunami anuppi veikkaraen.
<10 : Ungalukku adippadai arivey illa. 10 questions-ku score eppadi less than 10 pogum with minimum one mark per question? Neenga mostly Railway Minister-a irupeenga.
If you are not happy with the results, keep trying till you are satisfied. Take the average, standard deviation, correlation and all other confusing useless statistical data to get an accurate result. If its still not accurate, blame statistics.
Happy Madras Day!! :-)
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